Mother’s Day

Everyone has a different story. It is one thing that I love about our world. You can learn so much from everyone around you.

One of the most influential people in my life was my mother.

For me , Mother’s Day among other holidays is a little bitter sweet. My son was born in 2012 and I lost my mother in 2014. While he doesn’t remember his nana, the few photos we have of her on on display.

Living my life being told I would not have kids of my own was a difficult path, but I knew there was a glimmer of hope for me, because of my mother.

My mother was diagnosed with lupus when she was a young teenager. She not only was told she wouldn’t live past the age of 15 she was told she could not have children.

I was diagnosed with ovarian cysts when I was 12. At 14 I was diagnosed with endometriosis. At 15 I was told I would never be able to have a child.

For years I lived my life with this understanding that some things were just not in the cards for me. I went through years of indescribable pain that no one understood. The doctors prescribed various forms of hormone treatments. Some seemed to help , others made symptoms worse. Some worked well for a while then stopped. It was a never ending battle.

I gained weight. I lost weight. I gained weight again. I struggled with self image as I knew no matter what I was doing , the medications were not helping with my weight. Nonetheless, I just kept on.

Then while working two jobs and going to school full time, I was completely run down. I knew I was just burning out.

Exhausted and sick I just kept going. Like any other day I made my usual stop at the drive thru for Dunkin’ Donuts , plan ING on ordering my usual ice caramel latte. I decided on a breakfast sandwich as well that morning. While this all seems sort of trivial, I knew from the first bite of the sandwich that I was not just exhausted and sick. I was pregnant. You see I cannot stand mustard, but I ate the whole sandwich.

The first chance I got , I picked up several tests and headed home.

All six tests said positive. I couldn’t believe it. When my boyfriend came home from work that day he threw himself on the bed to take a nap.

I held one of the tests so he could see and without a second thought he was up and ready to tell the world.

I was going to be a mom.

Now here I am , 5 years later getting gifts like this….

This year the preschool kids made the sweetest little flower pots.

He was so excited to bring it home, he could hardly wait for me to see it.

This to me is all I really need in life. Mother’s Day is just another day that reminds me of my little guys sweet soul. I truly hope that is a trait that stays with him as he continues to grow.

As I sit here getting a much overdue pedicure ,preparing for our mother son date tonight I am just grateful for all of our blessings.

I am grateful for all the things my mother taught me about life and about being a mom. While I struggle and am still finding my way I can continue on my journey knowing that the knowledge I have gained over the years can never be taken away and will always be there when I need it.

For me Mother’s Day is a day of reflection of all the gifts my mom and grandma gave me. It’s a day when I am reminded how blessed I am to be a mother.

Happy Mother’s Day y’all.

Published by Bellaboymom

hard working, faith driven, combat fitness enthusiast who enjoys reading , traveling , paddleboarding , helping others, and cooking.

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